I want to begin this blog with two apologies. First, I am sorry that it has been almost a week since I’ve posted to this, I definitely intend to do better this week! So many of you have poured prayer, time and energy into this trip and I want you to be able to experience as much of it as possible. Second, I want to apologize for the length of this entry. The few days that I have had here have stretched and challenged me and I am only beginning to process and feel that I have a tangible lesson learned. As a result, it has taken me a lot of words to even begin to process these events and I would love to invite you into a dialogue.
We arrived in Nairobi and it took at least forty-eight hours to recover from our travel. I did, however, enjoy the wake up at 2 AM, 4 AM, 5 AM because it gave me the opportunity to hear the Muslim call to prayer. The first day we met our main contact, a man named Judah who is on the board of CRM Africa. We were immediately immersed into a very relational culture. We did three introductions as each person entered the room, then shook hands with every person when meeting and leaving. A pastor of a local church and his wife took us to the store to buy water, popcorn and taught us to ride the matatu (a crowded van that never slows down, even to let people on and off… I am mastering the run and jump!) from the grocery store to our hotel.
After two days of jet lag recovery we began our work week. It began with a meeting with a man who works for an organization called the Navigators doing something close to micro-loans. Similar to the vision of EI, this man connects US investors with Kenyan people who have a vision for ministry and a solid business plan needing start up capital. This gives locals the opportunity to fund ministry efforts. Eventually they pay back the capital, which is then used by other ministries without a pattern of reliance on Western funding. It was so encouraging to hear a man who is undertaking a very similar task to ours, and get his perspective on doing ministry here.
A lot of my reading before I came here described Africa as the land of contrasts. That has been absolutely confirmed through out my time here. Following the first business meeting, our entire team packed into a van and went on a tour of the entire city of Nairobi. It is probably one of the few cities in the world which have Mercedes-Benz cars driving in a dangerously close proximity to men carrying ten dead chickens tied on ropes being sold on the streets. A memorable moment for me was at one point a small herd of cows (30-40) walking next to our car in three lanes of traffic right in the city! Needless to say, we attracted quite a bit of attention in a safari van with a pop-up roof and eight white American faces and cameras sticking out of the top. Some people yelled “karibu”, the Swahili word for welcome, and others just stared.
Our driver, Cornell, took us through the busy streets and said it was packed at all times of the day. “We need you to come to make our small city into a big one. See all these Kenyans that need to work for you. There is so much opportunity here.”
After driving through the downtown area we went to a slum in an area called Kiberra. I have been to Tijuana and Ensenada several times and done work in many low-income neighborhoods in the US. This honestly can’t even compare. We drove through, still standing, with our cameras and had people yell in Swahili “Mzungo” (white man) and English “We don’t want your cameras” and crowded around our van. I sat down quickly after realizing how degraded I would feel if someone drove through my neighborhood taking pictures of me. I want to do some research on exact numbers for population and square footage because we have heard some conflicting information. In any case, there are anywhere from two to three million people living in Kiberra in the tiny houses made of metal roofing materials. The only thing that might come close to describing it would be some of the scenes from Slumdog Millionaire.
I was literally sick to my stomach as we left and I realized we were less than half a kilometer from our resort. The hardest part, I think, is then being me. I hate that I really miss hot showers. I hate that I spent the same amount of money that most of them make in a day on dried pineapple at the store just because it looked good. I hate that our driver dropped us off at an American restaurant and felt like he needed to eat in the car. I hate that he makes less in a week than I spent on that one meal.
After crying, at random points, throughout most of the afternoon I sat down to read one of the books that I am working through entitled “Prayer” by Richard Foster. (Shameless plug, everyone should read this book… I don’t even like books about prayer usually.) The chapter that I happened to fall on for that day was about suffering, and it led me to process and articulate a lot of my thoughts from the day.
I think there is an important difference between suffering and evil. Suffering, is guaranteed on earth and especially for people who choose to “pick up their cross and follow him” (Sorry, Joel Osteen). This has to be different than evil. Evil is the acts of humans against God and other humans. As Christians we are commanded to work against evil, but our instruction regarding suffering is different. We are instructed to pick up our own cross and follow (which describes suffering ourselves) and to bear one another’s burdens (share in others sufferings). In Africa there is an overwhelming amount of suffering—and probably will be for a long time.
My prayer at this point is that God would help me to discern what is evil and what is suffering. For me, both categories make me need Jesus so much more. Suffering leads me to his arms for comfort, provision, and dependant on him to help me meet the needs of those around me. Suffering makes the world long for Revelation 7, “Never again will they hunger; never again will they thirst. The sun will not beat upon them, nor any scorching heat. For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.” Evil makes me long for the Kingdom of God, the triumph over Satan and ought to lead me to pray at every moment “Your kingdom come, your will be done”. During my life on earth, evil needs to lead me to a firm resolve and fight against. Suffering, however needs to lead me to walk with those in need.
I think for most people Missions trips to Africa appear to make a small dent in suffering. Working with HIV victims, in orphanages or with NGO’s usually gives one the feeling that they have accomplished something to get rid of suffering. Mine, most likely, will not. Pray that as our trip continues we would get a better understanding of our role in a suffering world, especially as business people. Hopefully, this week will bring even more learning and insight into this struggle.
This morning, we are headed to the Baptist church of the pastors we had dinner with last week. They asked us if we would sing and “bless them” while we are there. There is one person on our team with some musical talent and the rest of us are really hoping that that we do not end up on stage. Thanks so much for all the prayers, I love you all and miss you a lot!
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Hi Juli
ReplyDeleteThank you for your insights from your trip so far. Having visited 3rd world countries myself in the past I am well aware it can be very overwhelming to us from the protected status of the US.
In addition to listening to Joel, I also follow Joyce Meyer, and I would rebut that their teaching on suffering would not necessarily contradict what you are saying above.
Suffering is part of the human experience, it is all about perspective and how we deal with the suffering that confronts us and others.
One of the things that is becoming more and more clear to me is that once we take care of what we can take care of, God will take care of the rest.
Thank you for being our eyes and ears in this enterprise and your ability to share with us.
Jeff Ferguson
Juliana
ReplyDeleteThanks for the insights you are beginning to provide. These are special lessons that will be with your for your life and you will be able to pass on.
I understand your take on suffering. This is a very long standing theological discussion. Interesting you mention Joel Osteen - I take it you think he would have a different take. In addition to Joel, I also spend some time listening to Joyce Meyer. I would view both of them teach that suffering has a purpose in our lives - learning our lessons is always a difficult proposition. When confronted with 3rd world extreme poverty, however, it it tough to assimilate what we see back in the States and comprehend the big picture. Not sure we really have to either.
We should be like the young man on the beach throwing back the starfish that had washed up on the shore. When someone pointed out that he had little impact on the big picture, but he said "it is important to this one!"
Jeff Ferguson
Thank you for your sharing and your perceptions of what you see.
Alright, here’s my two cents. First of all, let me preface that I was just reading 2 Corinthians yesterday, suffering has been on my mind as of late, and I think this is extremely relevant:
ReplyDelete2 Corinthians 1:
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our affliction so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ. But if we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; or if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which is effective in the patient enduring of the same sufferings which we also suffer; and our hope for you is firmly grounded, knowing that as you are sharers of our sufferings, so also you are sharers of our comfort.”
I believe we need to suffer as Jesus Christ himself suffered:
"He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not.” (Isaiah 53:3)
There absolutely is an important difference between evil and suffering, and they are indeed two different things, but they are deeply linked. Suffering would not and cannot exist without evil - and since we cannot escape evil in this life, we must suffer.
I think evil is separation from God, however that manifests itself. I think there can be just as much deep evil in a worn down hut in a village with no clean water in a family who steals money for food as there is in a nice suburban home with a family who works diligently, attends church once a week and pays the bills. Where there is separation from the Father, there is evil, and only the blood of Christ can eliminate evil. When you were talking about how evil gives you something to fight against, you’re right – that’s exactly what our great commission is, to fight against the separation of God and man by proclaiming the name of Jesus Christ.
Now I think there are two kinds of suffering, involuntary and voluntary. I think that there is the kind of suffering that a man goes through when he finds out he is about to die, or when he is starving, or when he does not have clean water, which is an involuntary suffering. Then there is the suffering that the disciples went through, being publicly humiliated and attacked by the world around them, which is a voluntary suffering.
I think involuntary suffering is the result of evil. It is the reason for earthquakes and pandemics, it is the reason that we can be depressed and lonely, it is the reason that there are men who steal and murder, hate and kill, live and die.
But voluntary suffering is something altogether different.
Voluntary suffering is a direct result of love. Voluntary suffering is love's response to evil, it is how evil is defeated. Obviously the greatest example of this is the person of Jesus himself choosing to suffer on our behalf. And why? Because of some great, unreasonable, unfathomable love for his bride.
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ReplyDeleteThat's just the beef I have with the "best life now" mentality, it's not biblical. We look at the life of Jesus and see that,
"He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth.”
We look at the life of any man in the bible who followed Christ, pick one, and we never see them cradled with health and wealth. We see them with their heads cut off in prison, being martyred, stoned, mistreated, publicly embarrassed, and disowned. The whole point is that this is not our best life now, we live for the life that is yet to come.
Right now you are in a place where involuntary suffering is rampant; your eyes are constantly open to some ugly side effects of evil that are scarcely seen here in America. I think when you said,
"...our instruction regarding suffering is different. We are instructed to pick up our own cross and follow (which describes suffering ourselves) and to bear one another’s burdens (share in others sufferings)."
Is exactly what Paul was talking about when he said,
"For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith - that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, become like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead." (Phil 3:8)
Juli, I think the best way to combat suffering is to suffer ourselves.
But what good is our suffering if it is not rooted in love? And how can it be rooted in love unless the reason for our suffering is that we may show people the power of Christ so that they may too share eternal life with our Father? To the point: I think that if we suffer just to feed mouths or to supply housing without also sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ, we are simply prolonging the inevitable. Yes, these people need our time, money, and a way to make money on their own, but most of all they need to know the saving grace of Jesus Christ.
Ok I'll wrap it up:
I think it's important to note that Paul refers to God as,
"the Father of mercies and God of all comfort",
And that when our suffering is abundant through Christ, then also are comforts are abundant. I think this simply means that when we pick up our cross to follow him, he comforts us with a true comfort... not with nice cars, or a stable job, or even a healthy family, but the peace that transcends all understanding, the knowledge that we are completing his work and drawing closer to him. That's why it's so important to bring the gospel into places like Africa, or anywhere really, because our greatest comfort that we can find is in Jesus. (And yes, even our greatest suffering).
I think the harsh reality is that Africa may be poor and the people there may be suffering for a long, long time. But the greatest comfort they can know is from "the God of all comfort; who comforts us in our affliction." The greatest way to share in their suffering is to put our life on the line and share the gospel – whether that be by starting business or planting churches, or having conversations with individuals. It’s when we open our mouth and avenues to proclaim the Word of God that we are attacked by the world, and that’s just the kind of suffering Jesus underwent.
Juli, you are amazing my friend. I can't tell you how I loved reading your observations, your insights, and your hope for what your time in Africa might hold. Poverty, suffering, and injustice are some of the hardest things to wrestle with. I have done it for over a year now here, and Josh and I frequently discuss how in the world we can live with a healthy perspective in light of the realities we've seen.
ReplyDeleteAnd I laughed at your hot showers comment thinking back to the last guest house we stayed in and how it was a genuine irritation to me to not have a sink :) And I was frustrated that it would even irritate me! I am still a wimpy American in so many ways.
I sure do love you my friend. And I love that you have this blog. Look forward to connecting with you in person in a few months. Praying for you too!